Write an Apology Letter to Your Boyfriend
Edited by Train Wreck, VisiHow, Eng
Whether you want to apologize to your boyfriend because you got caught lying or cheating, had a fight, skipped or missed an event, said something rude, or did something else, we want to help you apologize to him. While it is often true that a face-to-face apology is best, there are many situations in which a meeting is not possible or even not right for you. In these situations, a carefully written letter may be just what you need. Another big consideration is boyfriends. They are sensitive, but they like to hide it. When you are trying to apologize to your boyfriend in person, he may ignore you. Even though he might really want and even need your apology to keep loving you, he won't show it. Because of this, writing an apology letter to your boyfriend can save your relationship.
Why An Apology Letter is Good for You Too
When a face-to-face meeting feels too difficult or may be very emotionally charged, a thoughtfully written letter can help convey your feelings and your message more comfortably. Think of an apology as a way for you to first reflect on and understand your boyfriend's feelings, take responsibility for your actions, and make an attempt to amend the situation. This can help to improve or even restore and repair the bond of love you share. Just remember that if you choose to write an apology letter to your boyfriend, he may not answer. If he does, certainly don't expect it to be immediate. He may still be too angry, thinking, or have just silently accepted it. So don't follow the letter with telephone calls and messages. That can be irritating to him -- plus it says the apology was really about you, and not him.
In the end, if no response is received to your letter, you may simply have to let go. Because of this, if you must have an answer, then a face-to-face discussion is still your best option. If, however, you have decided that writing an apology letter is the best option for you, reading on for our tips on how you can apologize to the man you love and let him know he's still the most important guy in the world to you.
Write an Apology Letter to your Boyfriend
Remember not to wait too long before writing your apology. An apology letter delivered after a long break may appear careless. A few days is likely enough time to allow the most intense emotions to subside slightly, as well as allow yourself some time to think rationally about what you have done and the hurt you have caused. The letter that you write your boyfriend does not need to be formal, but it must be honest and sincere in order to be effective. Follow the steps below to begin writing.
- 1If you aren't quite sure how to begin explaining your feelings of remorse and regret, it can be helpful to do a small exercise of putting yourself in his place. Consider how you might feel if he did to you what you are now apologizing for. If needed, write your answer out on a separate piece of paper so you can come back to it when you are ready to write that part of your letter.If you are struggling with how to put your feelings into words, consider how you would feel.
- 2After you have opened your letter with his name, you should tell him why you are writing. After your opening sentence, you can add additional details about why you are writing: what exactly happened that requires an apology from you? In some cases, this may not be needed, but if you are guilty of lying or cheating, an additional explanation may be warranted.Let your boyfriend know why you are apologizing.
- 3After you've stated your reason for writing, you need to start apologizing. Acknowledge that you did not behave well and note that you understand the hurt you have caused. Remember throughout your letter, but especially here, that there is no place in your apology for excuses. Apologies are typically more effective when you own your mistakes and follow up with action, as opposed to attempting to divert blame and point fingers.Take responsibility for your actions, don't be patronizing, and don't make excuses for your behavior.
- 4Make it clear to your boyfriend that you regret your actions and the hurt feelings they have caused him. Here, you may also explain any action you will take to ensure that this doesn't happen again. Be careful though -- anything you say you will do, you absolutely need to work on doing. Words without action will appear dishonest and render your whole apology meaningless. That can create a whole other set of issues and put you right back where you started with this apology letter. It's better to commit to things you know you can and will do, rather than things he might want you to do that you just can't realistically do.Express regret and note what you will do to correct your behavior.
Before You Go
You will need to be prepared for a variety of scenarios after you have delivered your apology letter. If your boyfriend responds and wants to talk to you about the situation, you need to be prepared to listen. Good listening skills are an important part of maintaining a good relationship. He may also respond that he no longer wishes to continue the relationship, depending on how bad the offense was. This can also depend on whether it was the first time you hurt him, or one of many times you have made the same mistake. Alternatively, you may not receive a response. Prepare yourself for each of these situations. Talk to your girlfriends too if need be.
We understand that apologies can be tricky, but in order to be effective, they need to be delivered sincerely. The good news is that since you've have finished reading our tips on how to apologize to him, you're well on your way writing a great letter. Don't forget that we're here to answer any questions you may have, just let us know in the comment section below.
See more articles for women on relationships: Signs That Your Marriage Is Over, Telling If Your Husband Does Not Love You Anymore, Getting Relationship Advice, Getting Over Divorce (for Women), Getting Over a Broken Heart (for Women), Cheating Husband, Finding Out If Your Husband Loves You, Tell if Your Husband Hates You, Write an Apology Letter to Your Husband, and Surviving Internet Affairs and Repairing Relationships.