Use Words of Encouragement for Women
Edited by Donna, ramkrit, Eng, Maria Quinney and 2 others
Why Women Need Words of Inspiration and Encouragement
Do you have a friend or partner who is feeling upset about her circumstances and like she just can't go on anymore? There could be a number of reasons why she is feeling that way including:
- Feeling fatigued and unappreciated as she juggles childcare, house cleaning, a job and a social life
- A setback at work where she does not get a promotion or finds out she does not have equal pay
- News about a health matter that requires medical attention
- Having to take care of a mother or father who is ill
- Having her dreams made fun of by a sexist or misogynist partner or business community
- Finding out that her partner has been unfaithful
- Experiencing mood swings such as post-partum depression, peri-menopause or menopause
- Facing overwhelming financial problems due to world economic circumstances
- Being recently widowed
- Having her life held back by a major environmental disaster such as a tornado or fire
There are many situations for which there are no words, but it is important for women to have words of inspiration and encouragement because:
- Women crave approval and positive emotional connections from others
- Encouragement and approval helps raise a woman's sense of self-worth and self-esteem in a society that often sends her messages that she is worthless
- The unrealistic expectations of women hit hard and fast at every age and many women feel they are a failure if they are not perfect
- Many women feel like they are invisible in life and that nobody appreciates them
- A reminder to a woman that she is valued and heard greatly increases a woman's self-esteem
- A few kind words can mean the difference between a woman continuing on with her dream or giving up entirely.
- Identifying with her position by saying just the right thing can help her get through an incredibly rough time (such as the death of a child or breast cancer.)
- Women who are going through big changes in life (like a big divorce) often feel incredibly alone and need some acknowledge
It does not matter who these worse of encouragement come from in her life, a man or a woman or even stranger, but every little bit of support counts.
Encouraging and Inspirational Things To Say to A Woman
Here are some encouraging and inspirational things that you can say to a woman who is taking on a new challenge, pursuing a big dream or who has recently suffered a setback in life. Although some of them are clichés, it is also important to remember that a lot of clichés came to be, because they identify common experiences that are true. You can also paraphrase any of these ideas and quotes and make them your own, to suit the situation.
- 1This good advice is from Amelia Earhart, who once said, "The most effective way to do it, is just do it." Earhart was the first aviation pioneer to fly solo across the Atlantic. These words can greatly encourage a woman who is stalling because she is worried about what other people will think or how it can be done. It urges your friend or partner to be pragmatic and simply keep her focus on her goal, and not anywhere or anyone else.Tell her that the most empowering thing she can do is to stop talking about it and just do it.
- 2As Dolly Parton once said, "If you don't like the road you're walking, start paving another one." This also reminds your friend that nobody is ever truly stuck and that there is always a way through most difficulties if you are willing to be a trailblazer instead of someone who follows the crowd.Remind her that the path that she is envisioning might not exist and she may have to find her own way through life without a mentor or advice from others.
- 3As acting teacher, Uta Hagen puts it, "Overcome the notion that you must be regular. It robs you of the chance to be extraordinary." This is especially helpful to the woman who is always seeking the approval of others, to her own detriment, and who is upset about it when she does not get it.Remind her that it is okay to be different from others and that some of the most amazing achievers in the world have completely unique personalities, visions, and dreams.
- 4As the feminist politician and diplomat Madeleine Albright states, "It took me quite a long time to develop a voice, and now that I have it I am not going to be silent." This is for the woman who is thinking of not standing up for herself because she has somehow been told to shut up. The silencing that she is experiencing could be at her job, in her family or even because of her friends. Developing your own voice is about creating your own strong identity, and it is crucial that you not have that quashed by others.Encourage her to use her voice to stand up for herself and speak up for she gets what she wants.
- 5"Forget about the fast line. If you really want to fly harness your power to your passion." This is the advice of Oprah Winfrey, who grew up barefoot on a rural farm and came to be one of the richest and most influential women in the world. This advice tells your friend not to focus on the wrong things or put their energy in the wrong situations. It is useful for the woman who is dwelling on past injustices or thinking that her career is not moving fast enough, even though she is doing all the right things.Tell her to stop doing what she thinks she is supposed to do and follow her own path to success.
- 6Tell her "Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent. "This is a self-empowering quote from social activist and former First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt, which reminds us that we have a choice as to how we react to criticism from others and that, in fact, it is a delusion for anyone to think that they are not good enough because somebody else says so. This is a good quote to send a woman who has a very critical boss, relative or husband or who is the victim of vicious gossip.Encourage your friend to choose her reactions to negative comments, situation or people.
- 7As designer Coco Chanel once said, "I don't care what you think. I don't think about you at all." Many women receive criticism that is less than constructive all day long, from her boss, her partner, and even her children. Tell her to put offensive or inappropriate remarks out of her mind and focus on what matters: becoming the successful, happy individual that she wants to be.Remind her that she is in control of what she thinks about herself every moment and that it is a mistake to take the comments of controlling, jealous or mentally ill people personally.
- 8Rowling's is about standing up for what is right, even if you have a crowd going against you. Women are often subjected to a lot of peer pressure, and sometimes that pressure is from other women, who do not want to see you excel in life, as that can mean they are left behind. Sometimes you may also have a best friend who has different morals than you, and if you find her habits or lifestyle preferences are holding you back, you might have to distance yourself from her. This can lead to social isolation and even ridicule from others but you need to urge your friend to stand strong."It takes courage to stand up to your enemies, but even more to stand up to your friends." This quote, often attributed to Harry Potter author J.K.
- 9"Don't be afraid to stand up for yourself and keep fighting for your dreams." This is the advice of Gabby Douglas, an athlete, and gymnast who was the first female African-American to win an all-around event (in the 2012 Olympics.) Women often find themselves in a position where they are told they do not have a voice or a case, in which case they have to fight to prove them. This is a good thing to tell a woman who is going through a personal or professional battle where she may be told that she is not allowed to compete.Remind her that anything worth having, often has to be fought for or it may not be worth having.
- 10"Courage is like a muscle. We strengthen it by use." This quote from American stage actress Ruth Gordon is about walking your talk. The more courageous you are every day, the more you will overcome your fear of failure on your way to doing what it is that you want to do.Tell her that the first step that she takes towards her goal is the hardest, but then as she takes more, her courage and expertise will grow, taking her a place of confidence and power.
- 11"If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun." This quote is attributed to Katherine Hepburn, and it is a good one to send to your friend who is disappointed that she is not getting promoted or commended even though she is working the hardest and doing everything by the book. This convinces her to do a little cheating to get ahead or to take time off from work to indulge in some self-care or recreation. It definitely suits the workaholic who cannot stay away from her desk and ignores the other parts of her life to try and get ahead.Remind her that succeeding in life is sometimes about being a bit wilier, and playing things a little less stress.
- 12"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." This quote by poet Maya Angelou is about leading a balanced life that includes love as much as it does work. It is a reminder to take time out and enjoy the little things in life, which are as important as the big things.Remind her of all the other blessings that she has in her life.
- 13"Power is not given to you, you have to take it." These words of advice from pop star Beyoncé are about learning how to be entitled to what you know should be yours. Many women deny themselves power because they are afraid of being told that they are selfish. Once you have it, despite all of your objectors (because the world is still uneasy about women having power.) Sometimes getting what you, want is simply a matter of just grabbing it, and you do not have to feel guilty about it."Remind her that it is not a bad thing to feel entitled to what she deserves.
- 14"We can do no great things, only small things with great love." This quote by Mother Theresa should only be used with women who find themselves in a totally powerless situation beyond their control with real physical, environmental or financial limitations. The advice there is to start with the small things and do the best that you can with what you have and then take it from there. This quote is inspirational because it is about the ripple effect. Doing small things with excellence and proficiency radiates out and sends the message that you are capable of great things.Remind her that no matter how bad a situation is, there is always something she can do to improve it, no matter how small.
- 15Inspirational author Byron Katie asks women this one thing. "Do you want to meet the love of your life? Look in the mirror." Women are raised to nurture children and men, but not themselves, with the result that their own basic needs are often neglected, as well as their visions and dreams. In particular, these words apply to the woman who is letting her emotional growth be stalled because she is dwelling on a present or past relationship with a man.Tell her to put herself first, especially when it comes to a relationship.
- 16Life coach Celestine Chua says, "The degree of responsibility you take for your life determines how much change you can create in it." This is good advice for the woman who keeps complaining about her life but is not making any moves to change it. You need to ask this friend what the payoff is for blaming others for her lack of success, and almost every time it will come down to being a justification for not moving forward. Explaining to her that blame is holding her back can empower her because it helps her to take her entire life back into her own hands.Tell her that she needs to stop blaming others for how her life turns out and take some accountability for how it has turned out so far.
- 17It was the philosopher and author Ayn Rand who said: "It isn't who's going to let me; it's who is going to stop me." This is a reminder to your girlfriend that succeeding in life is often about determination and acting under your own self-authority.Tell her that she doesn't have to ask for permission from others to get what she wants and she is okay to pursue her dreams if she wants.
- 18This advice is based on a quote from famed actress Ingmar Bergman that states that "Success is getting what you want, happiness is wanting what you get." If you spend all of your time complaining then your prospects will seem much more limited than if you view what you do have with a positive point of view.Remind her to make the best of what she does have, by learning to love what she has and that she can build on that.
- 19The feminist writer Erica Jong once wrote, "If you don't risk anything, you risk more." This is because the fear of making a move because you might lose all often costs you the relationships and opportunities that you so badly require to improve your life.Encourage a woman to confront her fears, rather than let them master them.
- 20Louisa May Alcott, the author of Little Women, once said, "I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning to sail my ship." This quote is also about learning from your mistakes and learning to navigate through larger obstacles, without losing yourself or giving out. This ultimately will lead to self-empowerment and mastery of most aspects of your life.Remind her that most change, especially big life changes; come with all kinds of upheavals and uncomfortable moments.
- 21Humorist Erma Bombeck once wrote"If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it. Laughing can help minimize the emotional pain you might feel about a rebuff and it can also help you take things less personally. Laughing something off is also a good way to dismiss it from your thoughts so that you can move on. Humor is also a good way to resolve conflicts with others and potentially get your way.Encourage her to have a bit of a sense of humor about life.
- 22For instance, if she always tells people that she is a victim, then that is how others will see her. Being a survivor and even a winner begins with dropping the pose that you are a victim and showing others that you have a lot of spirit and accountability for whatever happens. As the weaver and transformational healer, Anette Stanley puts it, "Don't be the girl who fell, be the girl who stands back up."Remind her that how she brands herself is how others see her.
- 23"Dreams are illustrations from the book that your soul is writing about you," claims playwright Marsha Norman. This is good advice for the woman who is having trouble moving forward because she is being gaslighted by a partner or being told that she is making the wrong move. It also reminds her that when it comes to the subject of her, that she is the expert, and nobody else.Tell her to believe her gut instincts, hunches and intuitions about things because it is those inner voices that are trying to keep her on the right path in life.
- 24This comes from a thought by motivational Mary Manin Morrissey who says, "Start where you are, with what you have and then that can lead you into something greater.Even when things are really bad, remind her that she can do the best she can, with what she has started today.
Tips and Tricks
- Stating your words of encouragement in person is best, but it is also fine to send them by text or email or even make them part of a card or a letter you are sending.
- Try not to be preachy as you give this type of advice as you could come off as being critical, which will make her shy away from you (especially true if you are a male as this type of advice could sound a bit like you are mansplaining, no matter how well meaning you are.)
Categories : Relationships
Recent edits by: Alma, Maria Quinney, Eng