Edited by tinah, Eng, Donna, gayu and 18 others
- 1 Questions and Answers
- 1.1 How do I make my boyfriend love me more in a long distance relationship and also not to cheat. What should be my behavior?
- 1.2 Am distance with my boyfriend and each time I send him a message he sends me hurting messages does he hate me?
- 1.3 Me and my boyfriend are almost 1 year and we have not met yet, should I still hold on this kind of relationship?
- 1.4 My kinda of LDR boyfriend is too busy or too tired to call or text?
- 1.5 How do I text my boyfriend more and keep my parents from taking my phone away?
- 1.6 How do I know he loves me if he is an outgoing introvert?
- 1.7 My boyfriend is always busy with his life not even thinking about me?
- 1.8 How can I let my boyfriend know that he is obsessed with me without being too harsh on him?
- 1.9 How to keep the relationship going?
- 1.10 Do you think there is anything I can do to change an obsessive relationship? Yet still be together?
- 1.11 How can I make my guy commit to me?
- 1.12 How to make a girl obsessed in an LDR?
- 1.13 How can I get back my girlfriend when she was broken up with me due to misunderstanding?
- 1.14 He is coming back for the first time, what should I expect?
- 1.15 How can I make him miss me instantly?
- 1.16 How do get him worried or alert?
- 2 Comments
Questions and Answers
How do I make my boyfriend love me more in a long distance relationship and also not to cheat. What should be my behavior?
How should I make my boyfriend love more in a long distance relationship and not cheat too? I have tried: I've been calling and texting him since I left. I think it was caused by: It was maybe caused by the constant calls and messages.
The first thing that you have to realize is that nobody can make another person do anything in life if they don't want to. There is no single course of action that is available to make him love you more, whether he is long distance or not. From what you have mentioned about constantly calling and texting him since you left him, it is possible that he sees you as being overly dramatic, controlling and high-maintenance.
Your first step towards regaining his respect and possible fidelity is to apologize for the excess contact and demands, attribute the numerous to separation anxiety and then minimize your contact with text and social media for the next few weeks. When you do contact him, make the texts about a subject that mutually interests both of you or talk about an event that you are looking forward to going to where you live. By being optimistic, independent and less needy, you stand a chance of earning back his respect and desire to be with exclusively with you. Make a Long Distance Relationship Work is a VisiHow article that can give you more tips on keeping your long distance relationship from turning stale.
Am distance with my boyfriend and each time I send him a message he sends me hurting messages does he hate me?
We have been in distance relationship for more than six years, but this year I saw the picture of my boyfriend with some girl on Facebook. This is what started the argument, and I do not know if he loves her
Six years is a very long time to be in a long distance relationship. Neither of you decided to move where the other resided, and now there is the distrust within the relationship. Stop sending him messages right now. You did nothing wrong by questioning the image on social media, but it sounds like this brought up other deeper issues. Since he is just responding in anger right now, avoid contact. See if he contacts you respectfully or it is time for you to consider moving on into a healthier local relationship.
Me and my boyfriend are almost 1 year and we have not met yet, should I still hold on this kind of relationship?
My boyfriend is from Washington, DC and I am from the Philippines. In the last 3 months of our relationship, he transferred to here in the Philippines at Taguig City in Manila. On the very first day he transferred here, he had no plan just to visit me here in my city (Cotabato City). He enjoys his time there with his friends. He traveled to the Philippines but he still did not visit me here. We have been dating almost 1 year and still have not met each other. What am I supposed to do? Should I still hold on to this kind of relationship?. I have tried: Love him, trust him to be loyal, waiting for him, I didn't go to any date. I think it was caused by: I think it's all about his friends in Manila
This sounds like a very one-sided relationship. For him to not visit you since he has been in your country is a red flag. Especially after you have been speaking with him for almost a year. Either he has lost interest or you were just a distraction for him. Maybe he is shy and afraid to meet you in person. You will never know unless you take the first step. Make a plan to travel from Cotabato City to Manila if you really must know what is going on. Or stop all communication with him and see if he takes a step toward meeting you in person.
Most long distance relationships center around the next chance to be together again. Since yours seems to have fizzled out, perhaps it is time to move on. This is not an easy choice but eventually, you will find someone who can't wait to see you at the end of the day.
My kinda of LDR boyfriend is too busy or too tired to call or text?
We live an hour away from each other but being 17 its hard to see each other often, I see him like every 2 weeks. He recently got a new job and is very busy basically all the time, either that or he's too tired to talk. We've been in this relationship for around 2 months and we'd talk every day and he'd always text me good morning, we'd talk after school, then at night after he got out from work. Now he hasn't been texting me first and every time I text I feel clingy. We haven't called in a week and I don't know if he's losing interest or he's genuinely just busy and tired. I have tried: Given him space because I assumed at first he actually was tired but he's always one to stay up late and talk and now he's sleeping really early? I tell him I understand and he thanks me for it but I'm not sure about this anymore. Am I just being paranoid?. I think it was caused by: His new job.
You are both 17 which means that there is still tons of relationship learning that you both have to do. He has thanked you for being so understanding and that is the best you can do. Between school and work, he is busy and tired. Do not take it personally that he is not texting you like he used to. He is getting accustomed to a new routine and will likely begin to have more time for you once he does get settled on a schedule.
More questions and answers on this topic can be found here: How to make your boyfriend obsessed with you in a long distance relationship
How do I text my boyfriend more and keep my parents from taking my phone away?
Like to be able to talk to my boyfriend more. My parents won't take my phone. I have tried: To tell my parents if I can have the phone back. I think it was caused by: I really don't know why
Parents restrict phone access from their kids for a variety of reasons. If you want to keep your phone, then ask them why it was taken away in the first place. Was it your academic performance or did you damage the trust they have in you? One compromise you can offer is to suggest they install a parental monitoring/location app on your device. This will tell them of your location at all times, and they will be able to see everything you do on the phone. If you are doing nothing wrong, then you should not be concerned.
The reality is, your parents pay for your cell phone and the roof over your head. Until you are 18 years old, they are legally responsible for your actions also. All parents want the best for their children. Sometimes we go about a situation the wrong way but with good intentions.
How do I know he loves me if he is an outgoing introvert?
Hi Ermin. I met my person through matrimony site and came to know we are cousins.He is located far from my place.We liked each other's views opinions and we were good friends. In between, he was stuck up with so many jobs and we were not able to get in constant conversation every day. Again we were on the same track like how we talked before.He came down here to meet me then we took this ahead for marriage.we are engaged now.The thing is he is a very silent person by nature.Sometimes it's getting tougher for me to know what he feels.He doesn't like a conversation on a call.He tells me that we'll be together in 2 months please bare with me till then.sometimes I just feel lonely. It's different because I know this person loves and want to be with me, But it's that he doesn't get to understand that I miss him. I have tried: I tried telling him in a soft way
explained to him how I feel
Sometimes just have been upfront cried to me. I think it was caused by: Too much of financial pressure for him due to our marriage and he is working on night shift and I am on a general shift
You can wait out the two months. Some guys are not good at expressing their feelings or understanding a girl's feelings. He has asked you to marry him so this means that he is committed to you. Since you are in different work schedules, use a messaging app that will send him text messages from you during his awake hours at work. Don't force something in return but just show him that you are thinking of him and love him.
My boyfriend is always busy with his life not even thinking about me?
I proposed to him first, till now I call him, text him, he never calls me or text me, never interested in me when I ask about that he says lovely words to me and divert me from a fight. I don't know how to make him more lovable to me. I have tried: I always fight with him to show his feelings, he never shows his feeling to me, I do whatever he says to me, but even he is not interested. I think it was caused by: May be distance between us; I am far away from him we cannot meet frequently
When the distance is involved in a relationship, it is hard for people to show their love and connection to the other person. He may not show love with words, and because you are distant, you are missing the opportunity to see his love for you. Instead of dwelling and obsessing on how he expresses his feelings, work on showing your feelings and make a list of how he does treat you with examples of happy moments to refer to when you get frustrated with whether or not he loves you. You also may want to set a goal with him of living in the same location. If he readily agrees to make a time period goal, then you know that he does love you and wants you in his life.
How can I let my boyfriend know that he is obsessed with me without being too harsh on him?
I know he cares for me, but it is coming on too strong for me
Approach the topic without stating the obvious. Let him know that you are interested in dating him but that he is approaching your relationship levels too fast for you. Tell him that you need time to adjust to being in a relationship and ask that he respect your wishes. Be careful though because he can overcompensate when he backs off, and you will lose his interest or miss how he treated you in the past.
How to keep the relationship going?
So he said if I don't move up where he lives before next month he's going to break up with me. It's almost Valentines day, and I spent over 200 dollars on stuff for him, and I'm afraid he's going just to leave me. How do I keep this going because I can't just move up there? I have tried: I've tried telling him how much I love him and I can't lose him and he just doesn't act as he cares. I think it was caused by: Because we haven't seen each other in months.
If you can't move in the next few months, then come up with an eventual date and action plan to discuss with him. He is expressing that he is done with being apart from you and although your life may not allow a permanent move right now if you want to be in a relationship with him you will have to make a plan for getting to him within the next 6 months. You can also counter offer that while you are waiting to get your life in order, he can move to your location if he really needs to be with you. If finances are a factor, then tell him you will move but are worried that you will become a financial burden instead of girlfriend to him.
Do you think there is anything I can do to change an obsessive relationship? Yet still be together?
I have been dating this guy and we have been having so many disagreements and fights. When I leave to get space from him he grabs me and holds me back and says "Don't Go". He cries over me a lot, yet he has cheated on me many times I don't know if he truly loves me, I have only been with him for almost a year..I am 19 and he is 17. I know for a fact he is jealous and he doesn't like to see me with other guys, he follows me to the park sometimes and says "NO you're not going alone". He goes to therapy because he is like mentally disabled. I do love him still, I have feelings for him but I want him to change how can I do that? His family is under depression and he and his family are drug addicts. Please, if you please have any advice I would very much appreciate it. I have tried: Separated for a few weeks, talked. I think it was caused by: Emotions, family, bad friends, jealousy, obsession.
Run. This is the best advice. He is young and even though you have just a two-year age difference there is a major maturity difference. Sadly, he also has mental and drug dependency issues. This will only get worse and not better as your relationship progresses. Clearly, he is not the right person for you. Toxic relationships are hard to end but both of you will be better off if you do.
If you are fearful of how he will react as time progresses with more distance, then consider getting a legal no contact order in place. He is at a delicate age for learning how to behave in society and may not take the break up properly. Unfortunately, he also has no good parental influences to keep him from doing dangerous things. If you know who provides his therapy, you may want to report to them if he is following you or not keeping boundaries. Your safety is paramount at this time. 33% of teenage relationships in the US have experienced some form of domestic violence.
How can I make my guy commit to me?
I wanted to share this with you and want a solution for this. I was dating a guy for the last 4 months, but we have known each other for last 2 years. Now I've fallen in love with him and I want to marry him. But he's not ready for it. I am 26 & he's 27. I have lots of family pressure for marriage and I don't feel like marrying any other guy except him. My mom wants me to get married soon and settle. The guy I love says he loves me but he is not ready to marry me, at the beginning of our dating relationship he used to spend lots of time with me and make me happy in every way. But he slowly reduced texting, calling me and meeting me too. Every time it was me who used to take initiative and arrange for a date. If I don't ask him to meet me he doesn't meet me at all. He says if you are free definitely you will ask me out to meet you and that hurts me. He is very active and responsive when it comes to sex and dirty talks and of course, he will be there for me whenever I need him or need to go somewhere, but whenever I raise the topic of marriage he says he's not ready for it. If my parents show any other guy for me to marry I should go for it and that hurts me. A few days back I decided; this isn't going anywhere and it's better to back off from this. So what I did was I stopped contacting him. I deleted his number too. I thought maybe I should give him some time to miss me. But seems like he is least bothered about it. Last time when we were chatting it had turned into an argument and on that day I asked him... if you knew this was going nowhere then why did you keep giving me false hopes and promises of marriage? What were you doing with me? Why were you with me from so many months? You knew my feelings were growing strong towards you day by day. Was it only about sex, money and using me just to fulfill all your needs? He didn't reply me. That's the day when I stopped contacting him. It has been 27 days... but no sign of him. I tried to distract myself from thinking about him but this is killing me. I had a makeover, joined yoga classes and tried meeting new guys to date. Did many things to distract me from thinking about him.But nothing helped. I am not able to stop thinking about him when I am with other people or on another date. I am still waiting for him. I don't know why. Is this because of the lack of self-confidence, self-respect in me? Because I am still wanting a man who has told me right on my face that he's not ready to marry me.I don't know how to get out of this. This is hurting me badly every day, actually, I am ready to marry him. It is not because of family pressure but I want to and moreover, he was not ready to get into a relationship with me because commitment & relationships scare him it seems.he said I can't commit & all... you never know what life throws at you. We can't predict the future. So let it be as it is sometimes I feel what he is saying is right & sometimes I feel this isn't the time to experiment with guys. if you are not happy just leave him behind & move on. what do you think? Should I contact him & give him little more time and see how things go or should I just move on without turning back?I am confused. I don't know what to do? he's not even ready to commit to me. He says it's too early & now itself I can't assure to marry you. Sometimes he doesn't even call or text me for days & acts as if I don't exist to him & that hurts me. What can I do to make him commit to me & make me his priority?. I have tried: I've tried to do everything which he wants me to do. I think it was caused by: Me not ready to get intimate with him because he's not ready for the commitment.
What a mess of feelings. Your situation is a common occurrence when one person in the relationship is ready for far more than the other person can commit to. His aversion to commitment and marriage is something that may take years to get over. Also, you just broke up with him and jumping right into to dating others will confuse you. You are still grieving the loss of your relationship so of course, you are going to compare every other guy to him.
It would be great if we could force someone into a commitment. When we do there is often heartbreak in the end because the other person was not ready for it and feels stuck. If you want to be in a relationship with him then contact him. This time tell him that you are willing to see where this goes with no future promises because you love him and want to be with him. Take the pressure of marriage out of the conversation and enjoy time with each other.
How to make a girl obsessed in an LDR?
Actually, I am a boy and I just want to check out if my girl follows some of the tips written here to make me jealous or not, anyway I would like to know how to make my girlfriend obsessed with me in an LDR, have a nice day. thanks in advance. I have tried: I've tried everything I can just to make sure she feels best to have a relationship with me. I tried those alpha male tactics, flirting with her, teasing, role playing etc,. I think it was caused by: Well she is sweet towards other guys and she is a bit foolish and I've noticed that a clever person can easily manipulate her, so I always fear that she might cheat, sometimes boys talk sexually to her and she doesn't resist them which panics me. Also, I feel I am already obsessed with her because of her hot and cold behavior so I get jealous at little things sometimes too. But she says me that she loves me, still, I feel it is hard to trust sometimes
You just have to learn to trust her. Your opinions of how she can be easily manipulated are foolish. It sounds like you have a bigger issue with trust than she does with being influenced. No matter what relationship you are in, if you do not learn to trust then you will always be assuming that the girl is cheating. This stunts a relationship. She has told you that she loves you and you will have to trust that she is faithful to you. You can't blame her for being cold to you if you are always nagging her about who she has talked to and where she has been. This puts you more in an authoritative role than a love interest. Switch up how you start a conversation with her. Ignore anything that begins to have you feeling jealous. Hopefully, you will be able to enjoy being in a relationship if you drop your constant guard.
How can I get back my girlfriend when she was broken up with me due to misunderstanding?
My girlfriend and I, are classmates. We both got a job but in different cities. She started ignoring me and I thought that she was in a relationship. She didn't pick up my phone calls nor replied my texts.I was in a huge depression and left the job, then I didn't contact her. One day she called me and crying to continue our relationship. But due to depression, I made conversation with another girl, and I told her that I am in a relationship with someone in anger. She was crying every day and calling me. Then I gave the other girl the phone number of her, then we called in a conference and I went back to her, and I stop talking to the other girl. Then one day I was sleeping and couldn't text her and due to a network problem, she couldn't contact me by phone. She thought that I was again talking to the other girl, so for confirmation, she contacted with the other girl, and that other girl took a revenge and told her that we are in a relationship. Now she broke up with me. I told her that the other girl took a revenge but she didn't agree and blocked me. I really love her, now what I can I do? She doesn't want to contact me. Please give me a suggestion on how can I get her back into my life?. I have tried: I called her every day, she didn't want to talk with me. I think it was caused by: Misunderstanding created by the other girl
You did a very foolish thing by telling your girlfriend you were speaking with another girl and then giving that girl's contact information out. Your girlfriend has now lost all trust for you. The only thing you can do is continue to show her that you made a mistake and wish to have a relationship with her only. Over time, she may decide to speak with you again but it is going to be a rough road ahead of distrust. You say that you love her and if you really do then you will wait for her to get over what you have done.
He is coming back for the first time, what should I expect?
I met this guy a few months ago, though we haven't seen each other for the first time. Now he called me that he is coming back to the country, what are my expectations? secondly, before then, he has been behaving weird, he hardly calls, texts me like the way he used to when we newly met, giving me an excuse of being too busy. I love him and would want to spend the rest of my life with him. I think over possession of him, jealousy, don't want to lose him. Many might be experiencing what am passing through but are shy to voice it out. I have tried: I have tried calling him in order and also wanted out but he refuses. I think it was caused by: Long distance, I being too reserve, jealousy and lack of trust
He is coming back which is a good sign that he still has a vested interest in you. If you have been constantly voicing your doubts that he is being faithful to you, this may be the reason for his avoidance to speak with you. Long distance relationships often have jealousy issues. It is tough when you can't just go over and see someone or if they are with another person. There may be some transition time as you both get used to dating within close proximity.
How can I make him miss me instantly?
He pays less attention, I send him messages, but he fails to reply them sometimes, he says that he is so busy nowadays.
Stop sending him messages and take your time on replying to his the next time he sends one. It may make him wonder what you are doing and why you are not available immediately. If he does not send you any messages or calls within a week, then they're no longer interested in you, but at least you will have your answer to move on.
How do get him worried or alert?
I live 3 states away from him. He's the kinda chill guy but I like ones that show affection and be protective or worried
Someone like that will show their interest and affection in other ways. Long distance relationships are hard enough without adding drama to the mix. If he contacts you daily then relax and enjoy getting to know him. Make plans to see him soon. How to make your boyfriend obsessed with you in a long distance relationship has some great information as well as Get a Man to Put More Effort Into a Relationship. Look into the five love languages. There was a book published about them written by Gary Chapman. Once you determine how each of you shows love, you will better understand how to communicate with your boyfriend.
Categories : Relationships
Recent edits by: Mary786, VC, Jay