How Do I Tell if IM Being Used

I am retired lady who for my age I'm told I am very attractive .I've been on dating sites and when I meet up with men they become smitten ,and assume I am as well . Not the case ! I finally met the man I THOUGHT might be my future .I know for a fact he has a condo near a lake and spend time there .I have been seeing him 8 months and have never been invited nor met his friends or family ,He calls once a week and makes plans to spend the day with me that always ends up at his place with sex and an over night .He tells me where he will be every week as he is a business man and he ALWAYS texts me good morning wishes and that he misses me . He has told me he doesn't want commitment as his ex wife passed away less then 4 months before we met . They were not married but have a grown son and he was straight up with saying he doesn't think his family and friends are ready for him to be with anyone .I stopped seeing him because of this and did not contact him for 3 weeks .He would call ( I did not answer) and text as well ..I didn't respond . I started missing him terribly so answered a text in which he asked how I was and that he missed me .I agreed to meet him IN PUBLIC to talk .He says he cares for me and needs time to get to know me better before he tells people and commits . He says he loves me but the next time he doesn't even get close to saying how he feels . I'm so confused being my age and having been married for 30 years then divorced I no longer know how to play this game .My friends say I need to just go with it .I can't help feeling like something is very wrong and I can't figure out if its me or him ??? I feel like I'm wasting time and should move on but at the same time I am extremely attracted to him ? HELP

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