Help Your Baby or Toddler Go to Sleep
Edited by Yuliya, Eng
How to get your baby or toddler to sleep
It's a struggle that many parents are all too familiar with: the dreaded bedtime. Getting your baby or toddler to go to sleep for the night or even for nap-time can be one of the hardest parts of parenting. Often, it's met with fussing, crying, and extreme frustration for both the child and parent.
But it doesn't have to be like that! There are a number of tried and tested methods and tips that can help bedtime become less of a struggle. Believe it or not, you and your child may actually grow to enjoy it as a special time you share together as you wind down at the end of the day.
Below are some of the most popular sleep training methods, as well as tips that have worked for struggling parents. Remember: every child is different; every family is different. What works for someone may not work for you. Just stay positive and keep trying, until you discover the one perfect method that gets your baby to sleep, well, like a baby.
Sleep training methods developed by experts
Sleep training is mainly divided into two categories: tears and no tears. In other words, do you let your baby cry, or not? It's up to you to determine where you fall along this spectrum.
- 1Developed by Dr. Richard Ferber (and supported by a number of other doctors), this method lets your baby cry while offering less and less soothing, and is considered by many to be controversial. This method shouldn't be attempted with babies younger than 3 or 4 months old, which is around the time your child is physically and emotionally ready to deal with it.Ferber method, aka Cry-it-Out.
The method involves putting your baby down when she is drowsy but not already asleep. You then leave your baby alone, even if she is crying. You then return to your baby after progressively longer periods of time - first 1 minute, then 3, then 7, and so on, until your baby falls asleep. The Ferber method encourages patting and soothing, but discourages picking the baby up.
If done correctly, and if the baby's personality is the right kind for this method to work, this method has the benefit of teaching your baby to self-soothe, making bedtimes much easier as your child grows.
- 2Dr. Williams Sears is the polar opposite of Dr. Ferber. Sears is a supporter of "attachment parenting," or letting your baby call the shots. The Sears method encourages parents to be as nurturing and soothing as possible, since the first few months and years are when kids need the most nurture and reassurance.Sears method.
Sears recommends baby-LED sleep training, in which the parents observe their baby and go by his cues. He is also a proponent of co-sleeping, as well as rocking and nursing the baby to sleep. Developing a feeling of closeness with your baby, Sears believes, will help him associate positive nurturing feelings with bedtime, which will help him later on.
- 3If Sears and Ferber both seem too extreme for you, Nurse Tracy Hogg's method might be more to your liking. Hogg falls right in between the two, encouraging comfort while maintaining enough distance to allow your child to develop self-soothing skills.Hogg method.
The Hogg method simply says that every time your baby cries, you go and pick him up, soothing him, then put him back down. You repeat this until your baby is asleep.
Tips for getting your child to sleep at night
Aside from these methods, there are plenty of little things you can do to make bedtime more enjoyable for everyone involved.
- 1The tightness and warmth of the blanket reminds the baby of the womb, which is comforting to them. To find out how to properly swaddle a baby, check out our guide.Swaddle newborn babies.
Tips for getting your child to nap
Getting your baby to sleep during nap time is about the same as for bedtime, but with a shorter sleep-time routine. Often parents may find that their child takes a nap without a fuss but has trouble falling asleep at night, or vice versa. If your baby cries and objects to a nap, here are some things you can try:
- 1Young babies need more sleep than older kids, and might nap anywhere from three to four times a day. A one year old child may only need one nap.As your baby grows, nap-time will change in frequency and timing.
- 2They key is to put your baby down to sleep before he gets over-tired. Being too sleepy actually makes it harder for babies to fall asleep!Watch for signs of sleepiness like grumpiness and eye rubbing.
- 3You can throw off her schedule that way, and make it harder for her to fall asleep at bedtime.Don't let your child nap too close to bedtime.
- 4If baby's tummy is empty or he's thirsty, he may not want to nap.Try a snack or a drink a little while before nap time.
- 5It can be hard to tell if your baby is crying because she doesn't want to sleep, or because she's filled up her diaper!Check the baby's diaper, especially if you're doing a cry-it-out method.
- 6Maybe he just doesn't need a nap that day. Some kids drop naps altogether shortly after their first birthday. Choose your battles - bedtime is more important than nap time. If all else fails, just try an earlier bedtime that day.If your child absolutely refuses to sleep and nothing works, it's okay!
- Be aware of SIDS: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome. It's uncertain what causes this, but experts encourage putting your baby down on her back, not stomach, until she can turn over on her own. Do not put heavy blankets into the crib, and make sure your baby is not overheating.
- Dentists recommend not putting your baby down with a bottle, as this has been shown to lead to cavities.
- Remember that it will get easier with time! Many sleep problems are just phases. Expect ups and downs.
- Andy Eick - Baby holding feet 
- Lies Through a Lens - A Fathers Love 
- D. Sharon Pruitt - Sleeping baby with arm extended 
- Paul Goyette - Sleeping baby in crib 
- About Health: Pediatrics - The Ferber Method 
- Ask Dr. Sears - Get Your Baby to Sleep and Stay Asleep 
- Tracy Hogg - Top Tips from the Baby Whisperer: Sleep 
- Sleep Foundation - Perfecting Your Child's Bedtime Routine 
- CDC (Center for Disease Control and Prevention) - Sudden Unexpected Infant Death and Sudden Infant Death Syndrome 
- Fisher-Price - Why shouldn't I put my baby to bed with a bottle?