Ensure you are ready for marriage
Edited by Ephraim, Charmed, Innocent Yogo, Lynn and 6 others
When you think you're ready to get married, you and your partner should be prepared to face the world together, for better or for worse. Many people believe that marriage is a magical cure for all of their problems, but that's far from the reality. Once you get past the wedding and honeymoon, you'll realize there's a lot more to married life than wine and roses. A marriage is about real life, and it will take effort from both of you if you want to live happily ever after. If you're willing to work hand-in-hand, learn how to compromise and effectively deal with conflict, you'll reap the benefits of a life-long, supportive and loving marriage.
How to Prepare for the Ups and Downs of Married Life
- 1Ask yourself why you're getting married.
- 2Prepare for real life together.
- 3Make sure you both share similar goals.
- 4Talk about your expectations.
- 5Consider completing your education before getting married.
- 6Plan or establish your career goals before getting married.
- 7Talk about money.
- 8Share any known health problems before getting married.
- 9Ask married friends or relatives for marriage advice.
- 10Communicate with each other.
- 11Divide the household chores.
- 12Discuss religion before you decide to get married.
- 13Talk about how you'll divide time between your families.
Questions and Answers
Should both parties be stable to get married?
Definitely yes. While it could be very unromantic to be tackling money matters in a relationship, lifelong commitment in a marriage takes two responsible people who are open to discussing investments, expenditures, debts, and savings for the rest of their lives. Both parties should be financially stable before ever thinking of tying the knot. One of the leading causes of increasing divorce rates in the United States is financial instability.
Knowing firsthand if you both are financially compatible and stable is important in deciding whether you can work out your married life and finances in the future. Love is definitely a numbers game too. It should never be about power struggles or who earns more than the other. It's all about working as a team with a common goal. Real and mature partners in relationships understand the importance of money for daily expenses, schooling, medical expenses, housing, leisure, and other items on a checklist to ensure a better quality of life for the whole family.
Here are some things worth talking about to determine a couple's financial stability:
- Sources of Income. Do both of you have a permanent job? Or own a business perhaps? Are these regular income streams or temporary? You should consolidate and check on your sources of funds. Both men and women can dominate the corporate world in a complementary and equal fashion. It's not just a man's world - not anymore. Both partners should be able to contribute to financial goals to succeed in marriage. It is highly recommended that both couples have regular or permanent jobs to be assured that they can provide for the growing needs of the family in the event that they decide to get married. A joint business venture is also a great way to start building your financial future together as a team (or you can have individual business pursuits). Look into your combined income pool and determine if it is more than enough to cover your financial needs for the next 10 years or so. You can map out the necessary adjustments or arrangements as you move along. TIP: Home offices or businesses run at home are very convenient and cost-effective, especially for parents who have small children and decide to be hands-on with taking care of the kids while managing a business. You can definitely enjoy both worlds with this venture and rake in more profit over the long haul.
- Debts. This may be an embarrassing topic for couples who are planning to get married, but it is a must that you settle the score to be able to start on the right foot. Be honest in divulging your debt situation. If you both have minimal debt that you can easily pay off after getting married, then that should be fairly manageable. However, if you have a bad credit rating and have piles of debt that you intend to roll over after the "I do" part, then think again. Having a huge chunk of debt should not be a reason to change your mind about the whole marriage setup, but it should be a cause for concern. TIP: Consider working on paying off your individual debts first before getting married, so you can start together with a clean slate.
- Financial Intelligence. Are you a spender or a saver? It is critical to know your financial habits early on in the relationship because not being able to settle the differences with regard to spending is why many marriages fail. You should be able to complement and help each other when it comes to financial decisions. It is those little details that count in a marriage. Compatibility with handling money can make or break any relationship. If you both are efficient savers then you are definitely off to a good start. However, if both partners are compulsive spenders and do not prioritize saving, then that could be a huge marital problem in the future. Many people fail to realize that there are real or tangible things that must be looked at in a relationship, more than just the cheesy butterflies-in-the-stomach thing. TIP: Practice working on your financial rubble. If your partner is a huge spender, then you can try helping him work on his money skills and get his attitude on the right track. Share your saving tips and let him or her realize how it can benefit you both in the future.
Money figuratively makes the world spin around, which is why being stable before marriage is important. Marital relationships are all about getting your act together and pushing each other to be better, both in financial pursuits and in married life. If you are both committed to sharing forever together, then financial transformations are possible.
Categories : Marriage
Recent edits by: Marian Raquel F. Roncesvalles, Jonathan, Monika