Use Compliments to Meet Women
Edited by Donna, Eng, Alma
Complimenting a woman can be a very effective way to introduce yourself to her and open up the possibility of further conversation. However, there is a fine line between deliberately expressing your genuine admiration for her and saying something that just sounds like another pick-up line. In order to create a positive impression, your compliment must sound genuine, meaningful and it should not be so lavish that she thinks you are being sarcastic.
To do this well, you need to do is know who you are dealing as well as practice a bit of perception about what makes her tick. Then it is up to you to be thoughtful about what you say when it is time to actually deliver the compliment.
Step-By-Step Process You Should Use to Determine How You Should Compliment a Woman
- 1Make that any compliment that you will give her is going to be the truth about how you really feel.For instance, if you do not feel she is a good driver, then do not compliment her on her driving. If you do think her hair smells nice, then compliment her on that. Most women can tell when a man is lying to her and even the littlest fibs can make the woman feel like her intelligence is being insulted.Advertisement
- 2Do a bit of research to find out what matters to her life.You can usually glean this us from getting to know her a bit through her colleagues or by researching her online and in social media. Sometimes you can find out a little more about her, simply by eavesdropping on her conversations with other people. If she values her looks the most, then you know that you will be constructing a compliment to do with that topic along the lines of "You are the only person I know that has never ever has a bad hair day." If she prides herself on her activism, then you will come up with something such as "I admire the way you stand up for what is right in this society." If she loves her, children then focus your compliment on that by saying something like "I can see your children are as quick-witted as their mother."Advertisement
- 3Try to determine if there is anything that you can congratulate her on in life.For instance, if she has just won an award for taking great photographs, you could say something like "It's great that you are being recognized for having such a great eye!" If she has just won an award for her community service, then you could say something to her like "Thank goodness there are kind and generous people like you in this world, trying to make this a better place."
- 4Compliment her on any achievements that she might have made in the past.Do a bit of research on her online or by talking to her friends and then note it. For instance, you could say something like "I didn't know you were once an award-winning gymnast! I suppose that accounts for the amazing physically fit figure you have now." Another example would be "I stumbled across an old pic of you from your modeling days and it is wild the way that you have not changed that much." Make sure the compliment is believable. For instance, don't say, "You haven't changed a bit since your modeling days." She is likely to think that you are being insincere.
- 5If she is wearing something new or has a big positive change in her life, you can open the conversation by complimenting her on that.An example would be "You look amazing in that new dress." Another would be "Congratulations on your new job. I hear you beat out some of those most talented people in our company for the position, which says quite a lot about you!"
- 6Compliment her by telling her that she is a source of inspiration to you or a mentor to you in some way.One of the ultimate compliments you can give a woman is "I always learn so much when I am around you," or "If it wasn't for you I would have never had even thought that I could be good at drawing." Letting her know that you appreciate her advice is flattering and indicates that you truly value her.
- 7Compare her to a role model or somebody she likes.An example would be, "I love your strong independent spirit and the way you don't care what other think. In fact, you remind me quite a bit of Madonna in the nineties." Another example would be, "This strawberry shortcake is so delicious, I don't think Martha Stewart could do a better job of making the sauce!" Notice too that when you make a compliment like this, that you are taking care to be very specific, so that it is not mistaken for sarcasm. For instance, it is best not to say something like, "Oh, you are so Gwyneth Paltrow!" as that opens up the compliment to an interpretation that could be good or bad.
- 8Compliment her by mentioning an opportunity that she should apply for that somehow raises her profile or advances or career.An example would be, "You are such a great painter, and you should apply for a government grant exhibition at the Museum." Or "You run this place so well, you should apply for the new executive manager position."Advertisement
Tips and Tricks
- Never start out a compliment with the phrase,"Wow, I didn't know you could…", as that infers that you did not have a high opinion of her in the first place and are surprised that she could anything at all
- Always stay faithful to your research and do not try to compliment a woman, who values intellectual achievement, on how great her body looks.
- Some personalities, especially very intelligent or shy ones, find compliments to be a bit invasive and embarrassing, in which case, find another way to get to know her
- The more specific your compliment is, the more effective it will be as in "You look great!" is not as effective as "You look great in that dress! Is it new?"
- Avoid commenting on any physical part of her body, as in saying "You have a great butt!" that is considered to be rude and sexist nowadays
- Avoid using corny old pickup lines such as "Was your dad a prize-fighter? Because you're a knockout!"
- Never compare her to another woman as in "Don't worry about that secretary who keeps flirting with me, smart women like you are more my type."
- It is really a bad idea to compare her to your mom or an ex, as in "Wow, this pie you made is almost as good as my ex's."
- Never belittle her as you compliment her as in "Did you really do this all by yourself?"
- Never give her an awkward compliment that is actually an insult, as in "You look much better now that you have plucked your eyebrows!" or "You must be so grateful that you finally moved out of that slum you lived in."
- Avoid constantly complimenting her, or she might begin to feel embarrassed, or even like you are making fun o her.
- Do not text a compliment as it lacks intonation and is just not the same as speaking to her in person
- If you have problems with any of these steps, ask a question for more help, or post in the comments section below.
Categories : Relationships
Recent edits by: Eng, Donna