Identify Signs That Your Boyfriend Is Just Playing Around with You
Edited by Nerissa Avisado, Lynn, Nuance
Are you having doubts about how serious your boyfriend is about your relationship? You really like the guy, and you want to build a good, strong relationship with him, however there is this niggling doubt in the back of your mind that is making you wonder if he is just not as committed to the relationship as he has made you think he is. Here is a long list of signs that your boyfriend is playing around with you. Pay attention, and remember, you deserve someone who wants more than a good time before he dumps you.
Identifying the Different Signs
- 1You've been going out for months and he rarely tells you he loves you.Advertisement
- 2There's a lot he's not talking to you about, and he knows how to change the topic when you try to broach those subjects.Somehow he never lets you know what his plans are. Sometimes you wonder if you are heading for a "what you see is all you get" relationship with him, and other times you tell yourself not to be controlling and insecure. You may wonder; are you the problem? If the two of you are exclusively dating (you think), isn't it reasonable for you to know whether you are going to have dinner with him the next day, or if it's a good time to go out with the girls, or if you should go ahead and wash your hair, do your nails, and give yourself a facial while watching TV?Advertisement
- 3He intentionally withholds information from you.
- 4You can't guess what he's thinking.Listen, girl, if he is your boyfriend, then he is supposed to be transparent enough so you know a bit about the way his mind works. If that's not how it is, then he isn't letting you in, and it is going to be hard to break-and-enter that kind of a door.
- 5He has avoided meeting your family or your friends.
- 6You've been dating exclusively for months, but he hasn't mentioned taking you to meet his family.If you live in Washington and his family lives in Florida, it is understandable that meeting them would be a major undertaking. However, if you both live in LA, you should really wonder what the score is.
- 7He forgets you are around when you are in a crowd, or you are out with his friends.
- 8It's hard to make him spend a lot of time with you.You know he can spend big chunks of time on a sport or a hobby. He is also able to devote a lot of time just hanging out with his buddies. If it's hard for him to spend as much time with you, you know he won't be around for the long haul.
- 10He makes fun of you or trivializes what you say.This kind of disrespect does not bode well for any hopes of commitment from him. Maybe this is his way of expressing his casual attitude towards your relationship.
- 11You sometimes have to hear from his friends about trips or parties he is planning.
- 12He is technically a good lover, but he is never lost in the throes of passion.Oh my! If this happens, you will have to think about how personal your relationship really is with this guy. Making love is not just about technique; it is supposed to be about being intimate.
- 14He goes on out-of-town trips without letting you know.He's out on a trip and you don't know where he is or how long he's going to be away. Unless he is working as an agent for the FBI or the DEA on some secret mission, a.) he is extremely rude and thoughtless or b.) something is downright fishy. Of course, one other reason could be he doesn't think you have the kind of a relationship where he is obligated to tell you things.
- 16When you meet people he knows, he stiffens up, draws away, and introduces you as a friend.You know from his body language that he wants people to think you are a platonic friend; he's afraid they'll get the right idea.
- 17He lies to you.Advertisement
Tips, Tricks and Warnings
Maybe you recognize several or all of these signs, or maybe you see just a few. If you read this article because it is relevant to your present situation, here is what you can do:
- If you really want to get answers, ask him what the score is. Tell him how you feel, tell him you don't want to seem needy but you need a relationship with someone who is ready to commit. Be forewarned: He might give you a spin about getting to know each other better, or being sure about things. If he does, he's just playing around with you.
- You can also tackle each issue as it comes instead of making everything boil down to one big question. If holidays are coming and he is planning to go home, ask him if he has ever thought of taking you to meet his family. If he goes off on a trip without telling you, tell him the next time you see each other that you don't think it was right for him to take off just like that. Be forewarned: As you meet each issue head on, you will get closer and closer to the make-or-break question.
- Be ready to walk away if he is just playing around with you. The longer you stay, the harder it will be to get over him. Of course your heart will break when you end things, but be strong. Many women have had their hearts broken and lived to tell the tale. So will you, and when you do, chances are you will be with someone who isn't just playing around with you.
- If you have problems with any of these steps, ask a question for more help, or post in the comments section below.
Categories : Relationships
Recent edits by: Lynn, Nerissa Avisado