Deal with a bad kisser
Edited by Ephraim, Charmed, Jefrey Matias, Haycee Revelar-Obmasca and 8 others
Even though kissing is not all that makes up a relationship, it can be a downfall in the attraction department if your partner is a bad kisser. Sometimes, it is not curable and you will just need to either accept the fact that your partner is a terrible kisser, break up with them, or work on it together as a team. Do not believe that just because you love this person that this issue can be ignored for the entire relationship. This act will happen over a million times if you stay in the relationship for the long haul and it will bother you every time you kiss your partner, which will be a lot. If your partner is a bad kisser, this guide can help you in your dilemma and hopefully, lead you and your partner to better, more passionate kissing.
Take notice of exactly what you do not like about the kiss from your partner
This is the only way to identify exactly what the problem is. Also understand that if you do not know what a good kiss is for yourself, then there is no way for you to even identify if their kiss is necessarily bad. However, if you have had a good kiss in the past and know exactly what is good by your standards, then you can figure out what it is that you do not like about the kiss based on the following criteria:
- 1Duration- the kiss may be too long for you and you just want a simple kiss sometimes.Your partner may always be either kissing for too long or too shortAdvertisement
- 2Tongue- maybe you do not like the French kiss to be done all the time and would like for them to be just simple kisses without tongueAdvertisement
- 3Force- maybe your partner pushes into the kiss too hard and you would just like it to be softer
- 4Biting- maybe your partner bites you lip too much when they kiss you and you only like this a little, or not at all
- 5Open mouth- when you kiss you partner, they may open their mouth too wide, which sucks your lips into theirs and makes you feel uncomfortable.
There are many other reasons one may be a bad kisser, but these are the most common reasons for not liking someone's kissing techniques. Luckily, all these things can be fixed with some practice and following the steps below:
- 1Do not assume that your partner is the worst kisser of all time.They may just engage in things differently than you do. Not everyone is the same, so try to be understanding of your partner because they may just have a different style or is not used to how you like it. By not assuming that your partner is the worst kisser ever, your partner will know that they have room to make improvements, as well as allowing you to be in tune with your own technique, which may cause you to make any necessary improvements.
- 2Think back on all your kissing ventures.If you have been introduced to a certain style of kissing for a long time, and now your current partner may use a different style, this can cause the issue. Additionally, if you were in a long term relationship with someone, you get used to kissing that person all the time and also be used to their lips only. This can make it hard to transition to different kissing partner, which can make it hard or weird to kiss anyone else at all. This is something that is normal when switching from one partner to another partner. In this case, it will just take some time and effort.
- 3Figure out if you are attracted to them fully.If you are not physically attracted to them, then the kiss will seem bland and horrible. When you kiss someone whom you are attracted to, that kiss can be filled with passion, excitement, and enjoyment. Not being attracted to that person means that the kiss will be bad. Additionally, having thoughts about a former boyfriend or girlfriend can hinder good kissing because you may not be attracted to this new person in the same way as your old flame. If this happens, kissing the new person will not feel the same as kissing your old partner, thus, causing a dissatisfying kiss.
- 4If you are not in an active relationship with the person you are kissing, then you can be very blunt with them.Tell them that they are in fact a horrible kisser or show them that this is how I want to be kissed. It will seem a bit harsh, but this forward approach is necessary if you want a chance to be happy in a relationship with this person. If your potential partner is a bad kisser, it will be at the back of your mind forever and may ruin any chance of having a positive, loving relationship with that person.
- 5Pay attention to exactly what your partner likes instead of only worrying about yourself.Instead, work with your partner to find things that you both like. Be flexible; if you notice that you are a person who is not as forward, but your partner is a more aggressive kisser, then you know that they are going to want to engage you in a forward way. Try having predetermined signs that gives them the green light to engage you with more passion, as well as signs that it may be too much so that your partner knows when to stop what they are doing. This example goes back to the basic fundamentals of effective communication. Find out what your partner likes, tell your partner what you like, and figure out kissing techniques that will satisfy both of you.
- 6Talk to your partner about the situation so that the two of you can come up with a solution.Let them know what you like in a kiss so that they can get an idea of what you like. Also share with your partner of what you do not like about their kissing techniques so that they can adjust their techniques to better suit your needs. Be open to your partner's critique as well. Kissing goes both ways; allow your partner the chance to communicate to you their likes and dislikes so that you can adjust to their needs. By talking about it, you two will find some common ground on what to do. Kissing is a technique and just like everything else, can be altered to suit both of your needs. When having this conversation, ensure that both of you are completely open and honest, as well as willing to make any changes necessary so that you both can enjoy kissing each other with passion and excitement.
- 7As the old saying goes, practice makes perfect.After talking about it, show them how to kiss you by kissing them the way you would like them to kiss you. Conversations can go on for days without the person actually knowing what you mean. Nothing says "this is what I want!" better than grabbing a hold of them and showing them physically how to kiss you. Practice kissing with each other so that they can get a good idea about what to do. Also, you can let them try it on their own with you so that they can develop their new techniques and from there, correct any mistakes that are being made.
- 8Keep the lines of communication open because if you do not say anything, your partner will assume that everything is perfect and fine.Be gentle, understanding, and open when talking to your partner about this issue. Being positive and patient is important because you do not want your partner to feel that it is hopeless for them to satisfy you. Always try to use constructive criticism and positive reinforcement in order to achieve the desired results. It is possible for your partner to change their kissing techniques to suit your needs. It is also possible for you to change your techniques to suit your partner's needs as well. Remember that the two of you are a team, and must communicate effectively. If you and your partner love each other enough, each of you should be willing to try anything in order to make each other comfortable. Just keep at it, and continue to have good communication in order to find common ground between you and your partner. Once you find that common ground, keep kissing and trying different things that may help both of you enjoy kissing each other.
- 9Stop them in the act of kissing if you do not enjoy what is going on at the time.If they kiss you the wrong way, then pull away from them and stop the kissing in the act so that your partner can get the hint that you do not like how the kiss is going. By stopping in the act, they will more than likely notice that something is wrong, and change the way that they are kissing to accommodate you. Understand that by pushing them away too hard may make them feel discouraged. Make sure you pull away in a nice, supportive way so you do not hurt your feelings. By stopping your partner from kissing you in the wrong way, it will help them get it right in order to keep them from being pushed away later in future kissing sessions.
- 10Be patient with your partner for they will just need a little time in order to get things right the way that you want.I am sure you would want your partner to be patient with you if you were needing to work on something for your partner, so you should give your partner the same respect. Nothing can be perfected without a little practice, so be patient with them and allow them time to get things right in the kissing department.Advertisement
- If you have problems with any of these steps, ask a question for more help, or post in the comments section below.
Categories : Dating
Recent edits by: Derek S, sheryl hernandez, Lynn