Deal with Anger in a Conflict Situation
Edited by sheryl hernandez, Anonymous, Rebecca M., Ermin and 1 other
Anger is a strong feeling that makes a person become unpleasant and violent, because someone or something injustice and unfair happens. This is an uncontrollable emotion which many people suffer from heart failure. In addition to that, anger can lead to violence and aggression.
Many people are short-tempered and easily get provoked even only by simple reasons. This happens most especially in a place where people are busy working. Some people may get angry if they are bothered by something or someone. If two persons are arguing and are hotheaded and short-tempered, things will get worse, which may lead to violence and aggression.
Was there a time that you queued up to get tickets and then someone inserted in the line before you? How did you feel? You might have felt that it's unfair and you tried to talk with that person calmly. Yet, he or she suddenly reacted to you, even though you talked with him or her in a good way? And because you are also short-tempered, you got provoked, and then things got worse. In this case, both of you did not know how to deal with anger.
The question is that how can one deal with anger in a conflict situation? If the other is as aggressive as you are, what things should you do not to make the situation worse? Below are some helpful ways to deal with anger in a conflict situation.
Helpful Ways to Deal with Anger in a Conflict Situation:
- 1Be patient enough.One of the helpful factors that can deal with anger is patience. You have to have enough patience, so that you will be able to cope with situations that take a lot of time for you to wait. If you do not have patience, you can easily get provoked and make things worse. Patience is important not just in dealing with anger, but in all circumstances in life.Advertisement
- 2Breathe deeply before reacting.Breathing deeply can help lower your temper. Count 1 to 10 while breathing deeply and this will defuse your anger. This can also help you relax and reduce high blood pressure. Anger is not good for your health, especially if you have hypertension.Advertisement
- 3Take a break from someone or something that provokes you.You are working so hard and your boss keeps commanding you to do things, while you are still doing some stuff on your desk. You feel annoyed and you want to punch him in the face. However, this should only be done in your mind. What should you do in the first place? Take a break from your boss and take a deep breath and have a cup of coffee. You will be fine.
- 4Think before you act.Before reacting and saying some rude words, think first! You do not want to regret the things you have done later. Regret is one of the essential words many people should understand before doing things at once without thinking. You do not want to end up telling yourself, "How I wish I could turn back the time".
- 5React politely with soft tone.In a conflict situation where you are right and the other person is wrong, you can react to him or her politely. How to do this? Start uttering with letter "I" to describe the problem. For instance, "I was disappointed that you left the desk without offering to help with the cleaning," this sounds better than saying, "You never help, not even once!" Of course, you also have to react with a soft tone so that the person will realize what he or she has done is wrong and will not get provoked.
- 6Use humor to release temper.You do not have to become aggressive to release your temper. Why hurt someone, which in fact, you can use humorous words to release your temper? This can be an irony to show what you feel towards the person. In this case, do not use sarcasms as you could provoke the person.
- 7Use calming phrases to cool yourself down.Calming phrases are "relax" and "take it easy". Tell yourself these calming phrases whenever you get angry. Say these words and breathe deeply. These can help defuse your temper.
- 8Go outside and take a breath of fresh air.While breathing deeply inside a closed area is helpful, going outside and taking a breath of fresh air is a lot better. You can completely cool yourself down. The air can ward off bad emotions and lower high blood pressure. As you get back to your office, you will feel relaxed and your temper subsides.
- 9Forgive someone.Like the saying goes, "Forgive and forget", you should also forgive someone who wronged you and forget what he or she has done. If you do not forgive the person, even though what he or she did is unforgettable, you will keep on ruminating the past until you get old. According to the professor of communication and psychology at The Ohio State University in Columbus, Dr. Brad Bushman, forgiving a person is a perfect way to subdue temper.
- 10Write your strong emotions down in your diary, instead.Instead of showing your anger aggressively to someone, you can write it down in your diary. Write all your emotions in your notebook and this can help subdue your temper. You do not have to have a diary to write about your emotions. Any notebooks will do for as long as you can write your emotions down. This will transmit your anger to writing. In addition, you can think carefully about what you will react to someone who provokes you. This is because you have a lot of time to think while writing than reacting on the spot.
- 11Lower your pride.This is the best way to deal with anger in a conflict situation. If you lower your pride, everything will be alright. For example, if you and your partner fight for no reason, you do not have to shout back to the person and say some rude words. This cannot help you calm down. It can be temporarily, but you can hurt someone. Learn how to lower your pride, so that things won't get worse and you won't hurt somebody.
- 12Do exercise.You have a fight with your family members at home, and you feel like you want to explode. In order not to hurt someone, you can do exercise instead. Brisk walking and jogging can help subdue your anger. If you exercise, you will release endorphins, the chemicals in your brain that can help ease yourself and deal with your emotions.
- 13Be compassionate.Compassion can dissipate someone's anger. Do something nice for someone who provokes you, especially if that someone is your partner. Your compassion can dissipate your partner's anger. He or she will certainly apologize to you later, because he or she will think that you are a very nice person despite his or her character.
- Learn how to control your anger and do not let anger control you.
- Do not send text messages or any other technical means when you are angry. Instead, write your emotions down or make a draft and let it sit there for 24 hours. Read it back when you wake up the next morning, you will realize that you wrote an unacceptably rude letter.
- Do not communicate when you are angry. Wait for yourself to cool down, instead.
- If you are religious, do consider praying for your emotions to subside. Praying can dispel negative emotions.
Questions and Answers
Can you give me a usual situation about this?
Because I need it and I am not so comfortable with the example given by the internet
- 1At work.A very common situation when you are asked to contact one of your coworkers who has a higher position, and he or she would burst in anger at every little detail or defect in your work or questions. Never shout back or say something personally insulting. Listen to the person closely, look at him or her widening his arms, shouting at you or your team, and say, "Thank you!" This may be repeated for years, and you will have to ask in a calm voice if it is possible to explain everything in a calm tone. It is possible that this will change nothing, but if you respond in the same manner or provoke the person, you may lose your job and the person, who is really not enemy, will suffer too. The best way to think in these situations about releasing your anger later on things or people that deserve it: injustice or people who, for example, are mean to animals.Advertisement
- 2In relationships.People will quarrel with you, and you will have to wait until they calm down and talk to them or listen to everything and offer solutions. Make sure that your voice is calm and your phrases are consequential. Someone will have to step over his or her pride unless he or she wishes to break the relationship and apologize even if he or she is not right. Do not assume that it will be your partner.
- 3At a shop.The clerk may shout at you for no or little reason. The best course of action is not saying anything and leaving the store. There is nothing worse than a shop losing its clients, and a client who is not satisfied with a service will tell about it to ten other people, according to science of business.Advertisement
- If you have problems with any of these steps, ask a question for more help, or post in the comments section below.
Categories : Health & Wellness
Recent edits by: Ermin, Rebecca M., Anonymous